☆Samantha☆

I am so tired... dead tired.. trying to stuff in 134 lectures, histology and clinical competency in just a month time is a very potent killer to my brain.. @.@ at the end of the day it felt like nothing went into my brain.. Oh  God please help me.. I hope I can recall everything during the exams.. I hope i wont repeat the same thing like I did in  last sem.. Seeing the question knowing that i studied for it but can't blurt out a single word... Please, let me pass the exams this sem!!!!

Current status: Dead tired.. X.X
Current energy bar: 40% [|||||||||||||||                  ]
Looking forward to go back home.. I miss everyone back there..

Suddenly thought of bits and pieces of my future.. Haha.. Then i thought of.. Hmm.. How will my babiess look like ah? Look like Daddy? Or me? Then i asked May whether she know any websites where i can upload my pic and 'daddy' pic to see my baby... She said she forgot... SO i goggled (the power of google).. Regret searching for it cos i spent an hour playing and did not study at all.. Lol..

Here are the outcomes: 'Warning! Pls do not faint or vomit, just laugh'

No matter how you pronounce, 'Sorry' seems to be the hardest word (oh yeahhh..... a song by 'Blue and Elton John')

Its so easy to say sorry in some situation (automatic sorry) For example, when you step on you friend's shoes, drop their bag, etc (simple simple stuff), you say sorry without even realizing it like :'OMG!!! Sori Sori Sori!!!' that's it..

BUT, when come to situations in relationship, in friendship or family.. Hell, saying sorry is like impossible.. Saying that word make you feel like you're gone from this world.. Why is that so? Is it because we love that person too much? Or is it because we feel embarrassed, as in if we say sorry, that person will think that : Ha! You lose!! I knew you are going to say sorry first and bla bla bla....?? Even saying 'I Love You' is much easier than that!!!! (I know its hard too, =p) I was in few situations like this before.. One of it was, i kinda argue with a friend (a close, or maybe best friend), after that we just did not talk for few hours, sitting beside each other! How awkward is that! Both of us felt so uneasy.. But we just won't say sorry to each other.. Although we did talk after awhile, obviously.. But up till then, we did not apologize to each other.. Haha.. At that time, i was unwilling to open up my mouth to say A WORD sorry.. Its as if my mouth has lotsa gold and treasure inside.. At that point, i was thinking: 'What for i say sorry to her? Ceh, its not REALLY my fault mar.. She should say sorry to me instead... If i say sorry then i loose already lor.. If i say sorry then she thinks im so soft-hearted and chicken lo.. Then maybe she'll laugh at me.. Then maybe she won't say sorry to me again next time and I have to be the one.. No no no, i should not apologize first...' I'm pretty sure that this is what she was thinking during our 'cold war' moment..
Another one was she was the one who IS wrong and she just won't apologize to me... ?????? wth...

Is it all because of impression? Air Muka? Water face? I don't know... =/

Woohoo!!! Finally the number is here!!! 1314 in chinese means forever and ever!! haha. 一生一世.. Love this number.. I feel very lucky to be the 1314th in my own blog.. =D
Yea, that's all.. Maybe its lame.. Ha.. Ha.. I don't know

NOOOOOOOOOOOO............... 2nd term has started today!!!! Which means exam is getting freaking near!!! I have 134 lectures, 6 histology and clinical competencies to be done!!! Someone please tell me how to get all these done before exam! God, please help me!!

Had a fun but worry easter break.. I went to Belfast with Eunice, May and Tina on the 1st week and to Galway with my Kadazan family on the 2nd week.. Well, at least i get to enjoy for afew days.. Haha..

To break the holiday mood, I shall start my engine from now today on wards, i hope.. Hmm... Yes, I can do it!! Tahan for another 2 months and I'll be back home.. I know time flies like rocket.. No worries..>.<

I have nothing much to say for now.. Just wanted to post something to show that I'm still doing alrite here.. =D

Love,
Samiee

Hmmm... What do you do when you're jealous of somebody who is better (even slightly) than you? Do you talk about the person behind their back or try to talk about hurtful things to him or her just to make the them feel.... i don't know what word to use.. uncomfortable?? unhappy?? The reason you do this is because you just can't take the fact that he or she is better than you.. You're scared that they will be more popular in class / uni / clubs / among your groups of friends, etc.. You're trying hard to show everyone that they're not as good as people thought they were.. You're scared to lose to the person, you wanna 'eliminate' the better person from the gang.. Why did you do that? What do you get in the end? You do know that you can't be the best all the time right?

Secondly, i realised that even though you are green-eyed (from wiki) over that somebody, you DO imitate them.. The way they talk, the way they carry themselves and even the way they dress!!!! O.O Hey, are you trying to be like that person? Why not just try to be yourself? your real self.. It'll be much comfortable being yourself.. You don't need to put so much effort to imitate the person and fake everything out to compete everyday.. Its tiring..

So, just be yourself.. Accept people's good side and bad side.. Everything will be fine.. You will feel more peaceful.. Let the jealousy go...

I'm sorry if i say anything harsh or made some1 angry.. But this is just a small thought of mine.. =)
Good Day!!

Ah by!!! Happy Burfdae!!! May God shower you with happiness and be wise as you grow... =) Just want you to smile everyday... 

International Nite is finally over on last Thursday.... It was very fun and memorable.. Although we, The Malaysian Team did not win, in our heart, we're champion at in out hearts.. During all the practices, i was waiting for it to be over cos its draining all my energy.. I almost gave up because i skipped few classes cos i was too tired.. Especially the last few day, Jo and I have to choreograph for the dance for the ending.. At first we were really worry that we will not be able to deliver it to the dancers well, worry that they cant memorize the steps in just 1 night.. BUT, we all did it!!! We only used 1 hour plus to teach them the dance steps and we manage to finish it!! we were delighted..

At the end, I did not want this to be over.. I wish i can still go for practices and.. Seeing my dance team really make me happy.. I felt so close to them during that 2 weeks.. When the event was over, I talked to my "KADAZAN FAMILY".. The usual talk la, thanking them, saying sorry and all... I thought everything is fine until i opened up my mouth.. I just stopped at: "I..... I.... I....." no words can come out from my mouth.. I can't stop crying.. I kept looking up cos im afraid all my make up will 'melt' away... I could not talk for awhile.. I just hugged them.. I feel so sad that its now over.. When i stopped sobbing, i told them how happy i was to know them... Then, when i finished talking, i don't know who started to sing birthday song to me.. I cried some more.. I feel so touched, sad, happy and more..

I MISS YOU, MAY! BAVANI! VINO! BEDY! BEAR! ZAF! JUSTIN! 
i LOVE YOU GUYS!!!! =)

Phooo!!! It's been a very busy and stressful week.. I just had my first cardsigning for JC2.. I got a 'B'.. Yes, a 'B'!!! Ish ish.. Unfair, everyone got the questions on the Heart, Breast and Ribs.. Why am I the only one who got  questions on the auscultation?? That was the thing that I DID NOT memorize.. And the worse thing is that everyone got questions that are quite easy.. I wish i can jump in and answer for them so that i can get back an 'A'.. Or i hope i have been given the question on the breast.. haha.. Oh well.. Its over.. there's nothing i can do lar.. plus this is not the first time already..

Besides busy studying.. I have been busy thinking about the design for the Kadazan costume and thinking about the dance.. Thank God I have Jeck to choreograph.. If i were to think of the dance moves.. I wont have time to sleep then.. Sigh..

HBS assignment is also another burden... Have to arrange meetings and all.. Can't wait till monday.. This will be our very first meeting.. Haha.. I hope everything will go well.. Right now, to be honest, i still don't know what exactly the assignment wants us to do.. Will needa read up on that...

I really wish everything will be over soon.. I'm tired already even though it's just the starting... X.X

Today was our first anatomy class for JC2.. Before the anatomy practical starts, Dr Holland rang the bell and she said there is an award for the table with the best dissection for JC1 (my last semester).. I was like wondering: Oww, so there's such award wan ah.... icicic... she said there were 2 finalist and they made up their mind.. So, the award goes to....... Table 5!!!!!! I was like, Heh?? isn't it my table???!!! I asked my friend whether we're table 5, just to confirm as i saw them clapping happily (cos it was around 2 months since i went to anatomy class).. Then one by one we went to take our certs.. We still can't believe it cos we did not expect this.. Haha.. My group mate can't stop dreaming and he said he still cannot believe it.. Haha..

Although this award is a small thing, but well when you receive it, you have a feeling of satisfactory and it actually meant something to you..

18 students from RCSI, including me =) went for the conference.. It was 3 days 2 nights... There's nothing much to talk about cos our schedule is quite pack.. breakfast, seminar, lunch, seminar, bible sharing, dinner, sleep.. haha.. but the seminars were quite interesting though.. I signed up for Answering Other Faiths, Knowing God's Will, Mission Abroad and also Care for Dying Patients. But I did not manage to go for the care for dying patient cos it was cancelled.. Oh well, actually i think that was a good one cos as a doctor, we'll encounter many of this situations.. Sigh.. 


The last night wads really fun! We dances.. There was Scottish dance, American dance, Swiss dance and bla bla bla.. alot la... Hehe.. It was so tiring and we were exhausted cos there were alot of turning and jumping.. Lol.. My partner was Choey Ling (she was MY guy hahaha).. There were 2 dances where i partner with Darren Chew.. Man, it was so funny.. He's tall and I'm short.. Meh, can imagine how hard for me to lift up my hands.. Haha..

I met alot of new faces.. All over UK and EU.. Met different kind of people..

I guess that's all i can write? XD
Pics will be up soon

Ask yourself this question: 'What do i normally do without even realizing it when I study?'

I have been doing most of it till I realized it the other day, especially during exam period, you'll do it even more.. Cos you feel stressed out. Haha. Take a peep at yourself when you are trying hard to study.. Believe it or not? Believe it.. You'll realize.. UNLESS, you're those type of person that do not move at all when you study. >.<

Here's some:
1. Scratching your head, searching for 'golds' (if you know what i mean)
2. Looking at your fingers or nails or both
3. Checking out your hair, playing with it
4. Plucking split ends (for girls obviously)
5. Day dreaming
6. Looking at your notes but your brain is somewhere else
7. Biting your nails (sometimes)
8. Touching your face
9. Playing with your toes
10. You-Tube-ing
11.FACEBOOK-ING

Finally!!! I reached back Dublin this morning!!! Home sweet home!!!!